Your Love is WorthLiving
by Crumpled Thoughts
Summary: Sequel to Movin On Without You. Finally she is able to get her vengeance, but guess what? It s because of Natsume! I gues they were over but--- better to read it! Natsume is almost dying because of her... does he really move on? Humor.Romance.Angst


**DEDICATIONS:**

**mt4gt** – This is for you buddy! Thanks for everything, I enjoyed at the ALFG... You're the only male friend I got.. xP

**RainbowPrincess2408** – My big sis! Please write to me okay? ASAP, so I can write back to you soon! Miss you!

**-khatzie-** - another big sis! Thanks for everything. I owe you a lot, from your advices and everything...Hope to talk to you so soon! xD

**-kradraven-** Thanks for everything Rofel! You're the best. I owe you too...Hope to talk to you soon...don´t forget we should text! xD

**-dolphinie-**- Tama na big sis, It's over forget him na lang if he continues to hurt you.. I'll just be here. =)

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**YOUR LOVE IS WORTHLIVING**

_Written by: RainbowPrincess326/ Crumpled Thoughts_

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**Disclaimer:** I will never own it would I?

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Her hands were clenched into fist ready to punch the man talking any second. Is that how she was important to the Academy? That she needs to sacrifice her own happiness just to see their satisfied evil smirks? This must be solely cruelty. She was being controlled.

It was one reason why she came back to the Academy, after staying in Germany for how many years. Overseas, she was trained to be heartless. She was asked to bring out the tough façade of a woman. She did everything they told her. And now, was she never allowed taking something in return?

_Why?_

She's just asking for a time, a time of life where she can get her revenge—to the people who tried to destroy her life and to those whom had hurt her.._badly_. She's not doing it for anyone or anything. She's doing it for herself.

It's already over and yet..they won't allow her. They were ruthless beings who don't know how to spare life. They hired her to defend the Academy, but never to protect herself. She was just a miniature soldier. She was nothing compared to their big men. But they were still rooting for her, and that's what she call unfair.

A great asset?

Are they kidding? The Academy has lots of powerful students and big men to protect the security of its territory ground, and even the safety of the students. Their actions were provocative. She wasn't even allowed to visit the burial of a relative.

For old times' sake, she has no other family but her grandpa! And they were telling her she could not go..just because her presence might create a ruckus. They would always say, _'What if the AAO suddenly attacks?'_ , '_What if something happens?' _. They had use a lot of alibis to keep her from going. And that was exactly the reason why she's fuming. Her heart was eaten by undying hunger to kill—and get her revenge.

Her hands had gripped her auburn locks tightly. She groaned in pain but she held it still for a moment. Her tears suppressed themselves to cascade down her pale cheeks.

"I'm so idiot! You are stupid Mikan Sakura!"She screamed over in great anguish.

And that is when one by one, her tears fell. Non-stop as it was.

She was suddenly in hysteria. She threw everything on her way. She screamed in agony on her sound-proofed special star room. What's the use of everything she has now, when she has no one to share it with? She stared on nothing in particular. No words came out. And she pondered. Who else can feel the hatred she has now? Who else could have suffered this way like she had?

No one? Or probably, there is someone too.

Then a knock on her door was heard. It was soft until it gets annoying because it didn't stop. She just stared unconsciously at the silly thing with no sign of willingness to open it. But the knocking was getting hurtful to the ears. That's enough, it was over. She needs no one, because nobody will understand her.

"Mikan, it's me." an emotionless voice interrupted her in doing so.

She stopped. She was like seeing a ghost that she stared at the door hard. There was silence but the cranking noise made by the clicking of door. She needs to be alone, _now_. She can´t be a help. Even she'd compromise with Hotaru. There was still a time where she mocked her. And it just adds the salt to the fire.

Despite the coldness she showed, Mikan was there. Mikan had been trying her best to understand this girl who seem to disregard her amongst everyone at first. She cannot blame Mikan now can she? She has bragging rights now after all because she's been a special star since she arrived and she knew it well.

Mikan just wanted to be a good friend and showed her best friend how beautiful life is with her smile. But after all Hotaru had showed and said, she had learnt to hate her..

..hate Hotaru in her own simple and secret way.

'Mikan... open this in an instance please..." Hotaru pleaded outside.

"J-Just go away." she responded but her voice cracked. She sounded so distant.

"Move on. Your life doesn´t revolve only in your grandpa..."was the blunt answer.

She sighed desperately. Remembering how Mr. Narumi described her grandpa when he last visited him. His happy face despite his old age; it has always been sculpted in her mind. The smile he always wear and his hoarse yet strict voice that always bring a smile in her face. But he was gone. The bitterness throbbed in her, killing her as she imagined the bloody crime happened.

Her grandpa was brutally killed. Killed by men in black no one could ever describe. It was a morbid way of dying for an old man like him. It seems he'd undergone a tough suffering before he held his last breath. And it hurts her more than one could imagine. She couldn't imagine why some people are ruthless and merciless. If she could only turn back time..she wouldn't have left him. She wouldn't be there right now, helpless.

She was positive, a hundred and one percent positive. The only root cause of dishevelment of every alice student's life: ANTI-ALICE ORGANIZATION—the good-for-nothing cold enemy of her school, Alice Academy.

How could she forget the day when she was attacked by the AAO? And when they promise to have their vengeance on her? By hook or by crook, she's positive they're gonna do what's been said. She feared them, but her valiance abided and she brushed all the fears away. And now, she was completely alone in the midst of the dark alleyway. No one cares, no one loved her like the way her grandpa does. And to make the matter worse, he was gone.

"Mikan..." the inventor's voice cracked like she was going to cry.

Mikan smiled bitterly; all was over she didn´t have to pretend like she care, doesn't she? She isn´t hurt at all.

"Leave me alone. I don´t need your pity, Miss-know-it-all!" she retorted coldly while staring blankly ahead of her.

Even she can´t see her; she can imagine the shock graced on Hotaru's face. It was her true self after all, her whole true self. She doesn´t need to pretend anymore like she was okay even if she´s not. It was one thing that the Academy abroad had taught her. Be heartless enough and don't leave any trace of emotion. If you want revenge, you don't just hurt. You kill.

"I had enough of you. Just leave..I want to be alone.. "Mikan continued.

"You´re not yet okay, really. And I understand everything. I´ll just be here..." and she heard footsteps retreating.

Mikan Sakura tried to gather herself on the floor. She held her face and cried her heart. She has to do it then. The only solution she could think of.

* * *

"Are you sure to do this?" a male voice asked.

"Yes. I´m desperate..." the person being asked responded with a slight shrug.

"You´re life costs once you fail..."

"It's not like you care." Sarcasm colored the tone of the voice.

"I don't. I'm giving the consequence." The male said stiffly.

"I don´t care.." came the desperate reply and the person vanished among the tall and dark Sakura trees surrounding the Academy.

* * *

He looked at her quizzically puzzled. His hands traveling along her soft locks through her bare clothed back. Sadness is present among his crimson eyes as an eerie silence was planted. That´s better, than cry or shouts of arguments. His eyes were probing deep in thinking but worry was present. She cried because she didn´t have the chance to save her grandpa.

She had cried because of him. She cried because of the very single mock she received from him. The thing that made his heart aches. He ached because he let her cry for the second time. ...oh numerous times, he had made her cry often. He hurt her for no reason as if he couldn´t live without a single mock a day. The thing that he had regretted because he deeply knows how dear she was to him.

Her face slightly moved. In his great dismay, ruining their precious moment, -oh erase that- _his_ precious moment. He instantly removed his hands from caressing her hair and put it on his side. He could see clearly those thick, dark lining below her eyes.

Her eyes fluttered open. They were red, sore..full of worry, sadness, dullness, hatred—a mix-up of dreary emotions . Those expressions he hadn't seen even when they broke up.

"N-Natsume?" her weary pained voice stabbed deeply down his heart.

It was gentle and calm yet hoarse and dry.

His half-awake eyes suddenly closed again pretending as if he was still sleeping. He don´t want to talk to her yet. After all that happened, he can´t face her yet. His courage seems to drain away from his body. It's hard to explain in words so he kept himself silent.

Mikan sighed again as a single tear caress down to her right cheek. Why Natsume has to act like that? Like she would interrogate him with questions he never ever wanted to hear. It was like she was an ogre to gobble him. Is that how it was frightening to him? Well, she can´t blame him. Natsume did _his_ best for her. After all, the reason he was there is because of Mikan.

He was awake but he didn't move. He kept on listening to her. Natsume knew Mikan was stubborn, she can´t just possibly give up. She would still ask him questions he never wanted to hear. But he knew he can't blame her.

A slight shake of his arm bring the fire alice wielder's eyes back into light. He could clearly see the sadness and curiosity planted among her deep, brown eyes. He gave her a groan as she shook her head. She wanted to ask him.

Ask him about _that_ thing, but how could she if he continues to avoid everything. He can´t escape the reality, he must face it with a tough facade. That is how she knew Natsume Hyuuga.

"W-Why?" her voice trembled but she kept it whole, powerful.

He looked away, not answering but then she shook his arm again. It irritates him. Mikan always do that to him even when they were a couple. Whenever she bugs him it would always be a real thing.

"What are you talking about?"He asked innocently although he was fully aware of what really her main point is.

_Ahh. _There it goes again. _Ackk. _The pain was back. It was killing him, making him suffer. He don´t know if he can surpass this but his hope counts more than the raindrops. He still needs to live. He has to protect her. He needs to live to be there for her.

_He has to live to let her know how much he loves her.._

But this flesh-clawing pain prevents him from doing so. It was unbearable, agonizing pain had attacked him and he was aware. She shouldn't see him suffer. He won't let her see him in that state. It will kill him. He can´t...

"W-Why´d you do that for?"He heard her say. He gulped but it was unnoticeable.

Isn't it obvious?_ He did that for her._

"What?" he said calmly sounding confused.

"Don´t make me run through circles. Why'd you kill Reo?"Her stubborn side abided.

"..."

"I can do it myself, you don´t need to do that just because of me. You attacked the AAO headquarters just by yourself, and tried to be a strong fighter as if you can beat everyone. Don´t you even think of the people who might need you more? Are you that stupid to waste your alice for some people's satisfaction? I can't believe it." she sighed exasperatedly.

"Why does it even matter?" he asked coldly.

"Because I can kill him with my own hands." She retorted grimly.

"Shut up." said Natsume glaring at her.

She rolled her eyes and sighed again. Why this man can´t be sensitive sometimes. She's on the fit of annoyance right now, and she doesn't need another burden.

"You killed Reo..and when you killed him, you are aware that you could've killed yourself." Horror was displayed on her face.

"That doesn't matter. It's my life." He contradicted.

"And you should not care because that's my job too!" she yelled angry.

"Can't you listen to me?" Natsume said uncaring, "Get a rest and leave it."

"I told you, I can do it. Why´d you always interfere in my life? Don´t you have your own? Why´d you have to get my vengeance even if you know I can get it myself? You want to be a hero? Huh! Well, you´re indeed a hero now. You're a hero to nothing." Mikan continued sounding hurt as she turned away from him.

She´s angry, that's not questionable because it obvious. He stopped talking. He knows she was mad. The pain he feels deepened but her words are more painful than those he feel. He felt broken. And he will remain broken because he lost the trust she gave.

"You," she pointed out, "Why do you always make me cry like this huh? You hate me right? You hate me that's why you're doing this. Can´t you be more sensitive? I am worried about you!" she cried with tears dropping down.

He was shocked. All this time he thought she was angry at him because of what he did when she came back. She cared? His heart wants to leap in joy but -

"I was worried because I know it´ll be my fault if you had met any accident. It will be my responsibility. I was to be blamed. I can't take full responsibility to something I don't even know in the first place." she added.

It stabbed down deep his heart. He wanted to cry in joy but instantly she ate her words and it completely go the opposite side. He cast a bitter smirk as his bangs covered his now wanted to cry eyes.

'Shut up! Why would I tell you? What for?" he questioned suddenly. She was taken aback.

What was that again?

"A-am I not a—never mind. I knew it." she uttered feeling very broken. Yes, she wasn´t a friend, nor a classmate or even an acquaintance. Just an ex, a vulnerable ex- girlfriend.

She doesn´t have the right to question him. She doesn´t deserve it because she was to be blamed in this entire horrible incident. She silently cried as he stared outside the window. "Don´t be such a fool."

"You really hate me that much? Yes, I´m no one but you don´t have the right to call me a ´fool´ because you are more of a fool than I am!" she yelled hurt.

"Get out.."

"..."

"Don´t you hear me? Get out!" he said loud enough for her to hear. She stood up and gave him a knowing glance before she left. The loud bang on the door was heard before a complete silence was aired above. He sighed before plopping down to the bed. It's better this way.

"Aghhhh.." he groaned in pain. It was coming back.

Who will help him? The reason he shooed her away is because he doesn´t want her to witness him suffering in pain. That's no good. He needed energy to fight it. He will be there for Mikan. He won´t let go till the last breath he´ll give. That's for sure.

Mikan Sakura is a precious gem. A priceless to be exact. She was everything to him. After everything that happened, she was still the girl he wishes to be with. A sudden wave of nausea crept in him. He was losing his consciousness. He needs someone to assist him. He can't ask help aloud anymore.

"Sir! Are you alright?" the nurse came upon quickly just in time, rushing through Natsume´s side.

"Do you think I´m alright, you idiot?" he asked grimly bearing the pain on his side.

"G-gomen.." the nurse sounded frantic, assisting him before his world completely spin into the world of darkness.

* * *

He snapped his pools open revealing his crimson orbs blinded by the light. It was blurry and he got it clear by closing it and opening in few times. He looked around. It was quiet, no annoying Polka-dots to bug him to death. But then as he was about to reach for his hand, why does he feel that there is an extra weight pulling his hand down. It´s not that heavy but-

_It was her._

Her hand was tightly intertwined with his, as if not letting go. He wanted to smile, and he did. However, it turned into a constipated smile. He didn´t believe a single thing about it. Her hands were soft and smooth like it was just supposed to fit there—on his own hands. He squeezed it lightly. Why must of all girls, Mikan Sakura?

There are many more beautiful and talented women than her. All were craving for his attention yet why does it still beat for an idiot. Yes, someone like Mikan Sakura. But it's amusing only now he wonders why he chose Mikan above all. Probably he was holding on to what his mother had always told him and Aoi.

**Flashback**

"_Mom, what´s the reason again why you love us?" little Natsume asked his mother._

"_I don´t have enough reasons to love you.." his mother smiled._

"_Kaa-san, why do you love us?" little Natsume repeated his question. He was a boy who doesn't stop asking once he threw a question. It doesn't surprise his mother and answered him anyway._

"_Natsume, you listen to me okay? Loving with a reason means you're just obliged to love the person. But when you love without a reason, it means eternal. It means you've accepted that the person is worth loving regardless what he or she has.." his mother looked at him lovingly._

_But little Natsume didn´t get what she meant and began bugging him by asking what she really meant. So Mrs. Hyuuga, cupped the little boy´s chin and smiled at his adorable cute little features. "Natsume," her mother chuckled a bit, "let´s have an example. What if I told you that I love you because you're a handsome little boy? And the day comes that you lost your beauty? You became ugly.." she crinkled her nose._

"_Ugly as an ogre?" the little boy asked in great surprise._

"_Hmm. It can be.." his mother answered back. "Then must I not love you because you've turned ugly? Remember that the only reason why I love is because you're handsome. " his mother reminded him._

_Little Natsume´s face saddened and answered, "You must love me!" he cried._

"_Oh boy, yes I do love you but I don´t need to have a reason to love you because I love you the way you are. And that love is eternal" his mother said happily._

**End of Flashback**

Narsume smiled as he reminisced that moment. He almost forgot about it. Now he is sure on what to tell her once she asked the same thing.

Natsume gulped nervously. He can talk to Mikan. Everything will go fine..fine as he expected to be... He blinked a few times before looking at her eyes straightly. Her eyes were still sad but he will kept his promise to make that orbs lively and charming as before.

She was now wide awake. She was looking down, staring at their linked hands but she look up when she noticed that he has gotten back from his trance.

"Are you okay?" she said in worry.

He didn't speak but he nodded. "I-I want to talk about it." He choked on the words.

Silence ensued. It seems that she doesn't want to talk about it anymore. But then like what he wanted to do, she doesn't have the guts to oppose him. He needs to live, he needs to get better. He needed to fight.

She took a deep breath, "Why?" she asked again, "I wouldn´t stop asking those things again until you answer it."

"The AAO had done me the worst things. They killed Aoi, killed my family..killed my life and I was alone now..Besides, I knew Reo deserved it.." he responded quietly.

"Don´t fool me..You've told me before that you won't kill the monster who killed your family because that will make you a monster too.." she sounded like she don´t believe.

"Don´t ask me again if you won´t believe.." he retorted.

"I want you to be honest. What's your reason of endangering your life?" she demanded.

I can do this, Natsume told himself. He inhaled deeply and looked away before looking back at her and said, "It´s obvious, because of.._you_."

Mikan gasped.

"I still love you, that´s why I tried to kill Reo and get your vengeance. I wouldn´t let them lay a single finger on you. It´ll cost their lives if ever. It´s better this way right?¨" he tried to smile at her. His smile delivered her a tickling scent. It captivated and hypnotized her in every way possible. She wanted to hug him because of that.

But she turned her head down, "Don´t think I´ll be captivated again by your looks, we´re over remember..I don't keep stuffs I have thrown away. " and she prepared to leave when he pulled her back.

"You still love me." he said.

"..."

"If you have forgotten about me..you wouldn't stay here overnight just to watch over me. No decent woman would ever do that to a man she doesn't care about. I'm not stupid and dense like you are." He said.

Then the pain started shaking his whole body system making him groan.

She was astounded. Her feet were like glued to the floor. She wanted to help him..but—she leaned on his side seeing him suffering much pain. "What happened to you? You look so hurt!"

The pained look disappeared and he said to her blankly, "Why do you care? Is that your it's-my-responsibility excuse again?"

Anger rose in her as she pushed him away, "I stopped loving you! After that day, we are over!"

"But why do you still care so much?" he asked again.

"I try not to care because you´ve made a fool out of me! You promised to love me but you were kissing another girl. Is that what you call real love?"

Natsume chuckled and said; "She kissed me and it wasn't me who kissed her. You can´t blame if you boyfriend is that much handsome to resist!"

"But you still do.." she insisted on glancing at him for the meantime.

"If you only saw her when she suffered her punishment from me.. You could've sworn you´ll puke.." he smirked.

"That was mean of you." She said aloud looking past outside the window. A faint smile was present in her lips.

"It's doesn't matter. She's the reason why I lost the most important thing in my life. You´re the only girl I loved... and will love forever. I won´t be doing this If I don´t, right?"

She wiped her tears and smiled closing the distance and hugging him. Natsume was surprised and both of them fall in the soft futon.

"Then, why didn´t you tell me before?" she smiled longingly at Natsume as he smirked. The cheerfulness was back.

"Because you're too impulsive and you decided to just leave me. Besides, you never asked. Have you?" he said coolly as he earned a light slap from her.

The two laughed in unison but then an eerie silence was planted afterwards. Both felt awkward being too close after their break-up and soon Mikan is about to move on the other side when Natsume pulled her close and was about to kiss her -

But her hands were on her lips so he his lips only touches the back of her hand.

Irritated, Natsume had a frown on his face when he asked, "What´s with that?"

"You must court me again before you can kiss me!" she grinned while winking. The two burst laughing again.

Suddenly, the door opened and a worried looking Ruka come across the room rushing on Natsume´s side. He looks so terribly fat in his piggy outfit that the soon to be couple again burst out laughing that they nearly cried.

"What´s with you Ruka?" Natsume asked with his infamous smirk.

"Are you still alive? I mean oh—Are you okay now? I'm very much sorry, I just heard this morning what happened, I´m really sorry...¨ he apologized as the door burst open again and-

Ruka snapped his eyes open. A bandage was plastered on his face and he looks so terribly in pain. He uttered a cry in silence as he touch the part where the invisible something hit. It´s painful but what he doesn´t know is that, if all of what he was seeing is real

He looked at his right side, a smiling Sakura and a smirking Hyuuga stood, they looked all happy to his confusion... asking himself this, "They were over right? Why-?" but his queries were put into oblivion when he turned to his left and saw an evil Hotaru was with her baka gun pointing against him.

"I told you Nogi, the problem is resolved. Don't exaggerate much! You act so immature that you ruined thei moment!¨ Hotaru added and fire him three times more.

The remaining unshot sweatdropped at the lucrative scene before them.

**-Fin-**

* * *

Ola! Here's a revised chapter for the sequel of 'Movin' On Without You'. The title is gotten from Utada Hikaru's same title song. I hope you forgive my newbie writing skills. A few comments/reactions would be much appreciated. Ganbatte! ^^

**-Crumpled Thoughts**


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